Scars

As the world whirled around a pandemic, I found myself a little corner and wrote this poem down. Happy Reading!

Some chosen
Some accidental
They grow on you
Like moss on wet soil
They take on different colors
Like night's darkness spilled on marble

Or like the purple waves of the sea
They stretch and seep
Like water crawling down a bark
Was it the maker's mistake?
A curse of the past life?
A tactless accident?
But it remains engraved on the body
Still and innocent like a child gone to sleep
Where nobody knows how the child came to be there
And nobody knows what the child will do next
But the child remains
Sleeping and dreaming
It may leave some day
Or it may never leave
But as long as it is there
It makes its presence known
Announcing and proclaiming itself
Like a queen on her way to the throne
Its presence may weigh you down
As if you are drowning with a rock tied to your waist
Or it may lift you up
As light as a feather on a windy day
Where you rise
Above the darkness
Above the muddy seas
Above the scars 

Year 2121

This poem has a story behind it. I had no access to the internet for a couple of hours, which pushed me back to my long lost companion of writing. I took some time alone with my thoughts and wrote this poem. This poem fits in almost ironically with this scenario. Happy Reading!

Year 2020
He envisioned it to be one 
When India becomes a developed country
The tricolor flies high and proud
Peace and sustainable development prevail
Moving together like the wings of a dove
But I had a dream
Year 2121
When every drop of water has been sucked out of the earth
Gone with the times
Only remembered while telling bedtime stories
"Once upon a time there was water everywhere"
Left to the imagination
Gulping in their sleep
Hoping for that fresh sweet taste
They drag their tongues along the dried land
Searching for moisture
Somewhere 
Anywhere
Instead they find buried cities
Swallowed up by earthquakes and tsunamis
Making the people of Pompeii gape with fear
But even there they find no water
Trees shrivelled up 
Like a wet raincoat on a hanger
Carcasses of animals 
Providing nutrition for children
Books and pens 
Replaced with guns and bullets
Leaders pound the doors of North Korea
To end the brutal dictatorship
But merrily drill out the little oil left in Saudi Arabia
Oceans choking with plastic
That even the fishes come out to the land
For it is cleaner than the water
Women still try to end the patriarchy
Countries fight over land, water, clean air
Caste, community, tribe and religion 
Are now just sources of war
Chaos and destruction
Slowly, we become primitives again
With all the knowledge of the world
But nothing to do with it
We leap off the cliff of extinction
Fall into an endless abyss
Deeper and deeper
Gasping I woke up
Was this just a nightmare?
Or is this the future?

Does God really exist?

No, I am not an atheist or communist or Maoist. It is not a complicated question. A simple one: Does God really exist? I am not talking about the origins of the universe or the never-ending battle between science and religion. But a rather simpler version of the question which may be a vague spot on our consciousness. Like oil floating on water. Every question has two ways of looking at it: A complicated one and a simple one. For instance, when one asks How was Gandhi killed, you could either say by a bullet shot or say that as the result of the well-entrenched ignorance of men to understand his ideologies towards religion and politics. But for this question I want to answer it in the former method. I do not want to unleash the Pandora’s box containing the complexities about religion.

When I talk about God, I am neither talking about a particular religion nor do I have a specific image in my mind. In this context, God is a separate entity taking any form you like with distinct qualities, characteristics and an own AADHAR number. If God really does exist, then why are there poverty, death and cruelty in the world? Why was there a Hitler, a Mussolini, a Saddam Hussein? I read a book where the character speaks about a plot device called ‘deus ex machina’. In short, it is a device where Gods come in the end to resolve a tragic situation and give a happy ending to the play. If ‘deus ex machina’ existed in real life, I am sure there would be no World War, no epidemic, and no starvation. What a wonderful world it would be! But I am sure we humans would twist that too. We would keep doing more wrongs and wait for God to come and fix them all.

   What gender does God belong to? Is God a male, female or transgender? Do they also have gender inequality? Oh God! Let the Gods at least be spared from inequalities. Let us keep God gender neutral for now. Is there only one God or many Gods? Do they get along with each other and share a cup of tea in the evening? Or do they dislike each other secretly but pretend to like each other? How does God look like? Do Gods dress up in shining ornaments and silky garments? Do the goddesses have raven black hair flowing till their waist, crowns glittering with gems of all colours, face filled with such grace and beauty making any flower bow with shame? Poet saints have described Gods in such detail. The way their hair curls, the way their eyes glitter. Is all of this imagination or just simple description? If a God walks down the street would we realize it? We have always wondered about the three wishes we would ask God if we saw him or her. Would he or she listen to us? Would he or she be able to understand us? What language would they be speaking? Ancient languages untainted by humans? Or would they speak like a God out of a Rick Riordan book? What would God eat? In so many houses and places of worship people offer a wide assortment of food. Does he or she eat all of them? Many go to God with their demands and sorrows. Where does God go? So many questions yet so little answers.

Many believe in Karma. What if God lives in a little spaceship with buttons all around to control the world? What if he or she keeps a register of all the bad things done by people so that they do not go scot-free? That might be a far shot. There are many people who have done blood chilling deeds in the world living happy lives. What does God think about religious conflicts? So many people claim that they have been ordained by God to wage wars, hate and harm certain people. Would he or she be shaking his or her head thinking how stupid his or her creations have been? Or would he or she be saddened wondering whether he or she were the cause of it all?  Well I am sure in this case even God wants ‘deus ex machina’ to put an end to the horrors of religious conflict.  

Elections

Any honest introduction to this poem would only make me controversial or a hypocrite. This poem is my take on the ongoing elections in India. Happy reading!

It's that time of the year again
When you realise you are in a democracy
When you have to take up your weapon of choice 
The vote
There is a gift box
There is a lotus 
There is a torch
There is a sun
There is a ring
There are leaves
Which one do you want? 
One says "Let's save democracy"
One says "We will give monthly salary for the poor"
One says "Main bhi chowkidhar"
One says nothing and simply hands out Gandhis
They attempt to capture voters
Laying a bait waiting for them to walk into the trap
And every five years the voters walk in
With a smile on their face and faith in their hearts
That this time it will be different
First they start speaking 
The crowd gapes as the leader speaks in a foreign language
Maybe Hindi
The translator is no good either
Then the memes galore
 Then the accusations flow in
"They are corrupt!"
"He is supporting criminals"
"He is just an actor. What does he know?"
Defamation cases galore
Then they hit the street
They sing songs about dead leaders
Who would roll in their graves if they heard them
A politician begs somewhere
His son somewhere else
His wife talks about her husband in one place
His uncle's second son's daughter in another place
One has been accused of nepotism
One has been accused of corruption
One has acted in movies against corruption
One has been accused of rape
The other murder
Another one of black money
Raids, flying squads, investigations, vehicle checks
But an eagle cannot eye the whole world however high it flies
Then the newspaper reports galore
Flags of red and black
Orange, white and green
Red, blue and white
A smiling face of a leader
Shaking hands with the American president
Being a superhero
Speaking on the phone
Walking

Kissing a baby
Talking to an old lady 

With a skeletal frame and a betel stained smile

Our heartbeat 
Our hero
Our mother
Our aunt
Our grandfather
Our God
The posters galore
But they are all the same
When two mirrors face each other
You can see infinite reflections of yourself
But here the reflections are of different politicians
Who are just mirror versions of each other
Doing the same old thing 
But you still vote
You believe that by your vote
A new day would dawn
And everything would change
But does it?

What should a woman do?

What should a woman do? If a girl child is born after evading attempts to find her gender with a sonogram and her grandmother’s attempts to judge the gender by the swell of the belly, she is looked at by family members as a curse for their past life sins. She is named ‘podhumponnu’ as a reminder to Fate to give them no more girl children. She is brought up wearing frilly frocks with puffed shoulders. “Oh you must make her look fair! Dark skin is no good. Who will marry her?” She is forced to play house with her friends as she eyes her brother’s football. Then comes education. “School ah? What for? She is going to study and become collector is it? Go help your mother in the kitchen.” What should a woman do? All the begging and crying helps her go to school. She goes to a school where toilets are almost a mile away. She sits in the ground with other girls laughing during P.E period while watching a cricket ball fly up in the sky. Then she bleeds. One day they celebrate her with all the sandal wood, silk sarees and bangles. “Oh you are a woman now”. “Isn’t it too early?” “Congrats you will get a grandson now” But the next month she is made to sit alone in one corner. “Don’t come to the kitchen” Don’t touch me” “Don’t go near God”. What should a woman do? Then comes college. “I gave you so much freedom to study till 12th! Isn’t that enough? See this is why girls shouldn’t be let out of their houses! Look at your daughter, Lakshmi! Go ask her to join one of those ‘loose’ women shouting about gender equality while sleeping with every man they see! You are going to bring shame to our family”. At night she watched her father intently listen to a man talking about a woman who once ruled the country, wore sleeveless blouses and was widowed. Her mother forgets to cover her head once, “Chee go cover yourself you shameless woman!”  What should a woman do? Fine I will let you study in the closest girls’ college. What do you want to study? Arts? Nursing? Music? Dance?  Anything you want you can study! What? You want to become architect? HAHAHA! You are going to become mason is it? Build pink houses to live with your husband? That course is so much work, lots of technical things. Not suitable for a woman. Oh well, then is anything suitable for a woman? Again begging and tears. She goes to a college to study architecture. The day her father couldn’t drop her came the catcalling. “Hey beautiful” “Which college?” “Vaadi vaadi naatukattai vasama vanthu maatikittai”. In college it is worse. The professors old enough to be her father suddenly want to have deep conversations with her about the subject, obviously. “You should come to my office I will help you with your project”. She begins her online life like any other student. Random text messages, threats, coaxing and inappropriate pictures. A guy in her street loves her deeply. So he claims. He writes her name in blood for her, waits for her down the street and suffocates her with his presence everywhere. If she says no to him she will get acid thrown on her face, if she says yes to him she is likely to be raped in a shady mansion in the pretext of ‘talking’. What should a woman do? During all this, her mother has already started. “You know Kamalam’s son is older than you and is a doctor. What do you think?” “Why did you have to study such a big degree? Now no one wants to marry you” “No not that guy he is shorter than her” “No not him he is younger than her”. What should a woman do? She finishes her degree and wants to work. “Enough of this! What will people think when they learn that I am running this house with my daughter’s money? Thu! They will spit on me. Never!”. But his pride doesn’t stop the taunts “I spent all my savings on your education and I get nothing in return. What use is your degree?”. What should a woman do? Her father reluctantly allows her to go to work. Her boss is full of suggestions for her “You should smile more” “Red suits you” “Why don’t you wear a saree, flowers and bindhi? So plain you look! Only you people should carry on our culture”. You don’t need to meet clients, let the men do that. They don’t like to talk to women about business. You don’t need to come for night shifts, let the men do that. Business travels are not for women. Not safe ma, you are like my daughter. You should be careful.  And in the end, promotion and increment are also for men. What should a woman do? Her parents doll her up and get her married to a man eight years her senior, taller than her and with three degrees. And then the cycle repeats itself.

Why do we need zoos?

It was a random afternoon when I was reading the novel, A Tiger for Malgudi when this thought struck me: Why do we need zoos? Sure, Raja seems happier at a zoo but really why DO we need zoos? So this article is literally me typing my thoughts. A long, long time ago there were human exhibits in what was referred to as ‘Ethnographic’ museums. Natives of different lands whose lifestyles were relatively unknown were brought to Europe and America to do something easy yet difficult: live. They were forced to carry out their normal activities with thousands of people gawking at them. They were chained, malnourished and tortured mentally and physically. They were torn from their lands to become exhibits reducing their existence to non- living things. They also performed practiced acts to showcase their ‘primitiveness’. These were meant to educate people about the different cultures and people across the world but really served the pathetic ‘superiority’ of civilised Europeans. Another concept was ‘freak shows’ where people with physical and mental disabilities performed acts for the amusement of the nouveau riche. People laughed and enjoyed others’ special qualities and termed them as ‘imperfections’. Those without arms or legs were called ‘Snake man’ or ‘Seal man’. This sounds cruel, unfair and like Hitler’s utopia. Thank God humans finally put an end to these inhumane actions. But did we? I have been fortunate (or unfortunate) enough to visit zoos in India and outside. In tropical Singapore, people were filled with immense sorrow when Inuka the polar bear born and raised in captivity in the country died at 27. There was much media attention around the polar bear whose name was chosen through a naming contest across the country and birthdays celebrated with extravagant cakes. So we took polar bears from their native habitats (somewhere not as hot as Singapore) and put them in an artificially induced atmosphere with a single iceberg to make them feel at home. However close their captive area may be to their original habitat, it still doesn’t take away the fact that it is artificial. So they are torn from the where they are meant to live and forced to live in captivity for public attraction. Check that. Also the zoo is known for their show timings where birds fly from nowhere perfectly onto the staff’s arm, audience can touch a bear and tourists can feed leopards. Performing acts for public’s muse? Check that.  When I visited Thailand, I went to a Tiger temple. The name is misleading as there was nothing holy like a temple or fiery like a tiger. We were made to change into light coloured pants and went to look at the tigers. The tigers were chained and appeared to be drugged with some substance that made them drowsy and heavy. The only job of the tamers was to take pictures for tourists. Tourists could pet them and even feed tiger cubs with feeding bottles meant for humans. So they were no longer tigers but domicile cats found on the street corner. My stay in Thailand included a lot of elephant riding where they were beaten with sticks, feeding elephants with bananas and snakes performing with men. But wait the story is not over yet. How can I forget our very own beautiful and scenic Vandalur zoo? At the zoo, we went on a Tourister bus and saw the lions. But the catch here was that one lion was kept alone in an enclosure. When asked why, the driver replied that it had fought with the other lions and thus kept alone. Sounds like ‘rest and isolation’ that Raja endured in the circus. Mental and physical torture? Check Check Check! So centuries ago we considered other human beings as lesser living things but now we consider all sorts of animals as lesser living beings and treat them in the most unimaginable way possible. We cannot claim superiority because we are on the top of the food chain. Pull out any person living in the city and leave them unprotected in the forest and you can see for yourselves who is really on top of the food chain.

The primary arguments supporting zoos are a) they educate people about our ecosystem and its inhabitants and b) they sometimes serve as conservation centres for breeding animals endangered in the wild. Let’s look at the first argument “they educate people”. How many people actually take time to read descriptions about every single animal on exhibits? When I went to Vandalur it seemed like mating season because most of the couples who visited, huddled behind trees and benches. “They serve as conservation centres”. Fair enough. But think about another thing, the ‘Association of Zoos and Aquariums’ in the USA found among all the animals in the 228 zoos (now 233) which it has accredited, only 30 species are for conservation. Most of these species cannot be let out in the wild again. So they will live but not like how they used to.

When there are so many activists condemning elephants held in temples then why is nobody talking about zoos? The real distinction here is between a good zoo and a bad zoo. But the line is so thin that people consider it normal for an animal to be kept in an enclosure which has nothing but an entrance for food and a tree. So what can we do about this? Unfortunately, I am not qualified enough to suggest an alternative because I cannot think of a good one. My aim with this post was to teleport this thought from my brain to yours. So if you have received that thought then do something with it: Think about it.  

THE WHISTLEBLOWERS OF SAUDI ARABIA: THE KINGDOM OF MEN

Chrystopher Wylie and Afzal Kohistani are considered two of the most well known whistleblowers of modern day acts against individual rights. Investigative journalism by N. Ram on the Rafale deal and Suki kim for her undercover work in North Korea have been considered a couple of the most daring acts of the day. But equally or more important have been the exposés about the kingdom of oil, dates, gold and men: Saudi Arabia. Saudi Arabia has been on the news lately for a range of reasons. With Crown Prince Mohammad Bin Salman’s (MBS) ‘revolutionary’ changes, Act East policy, attempts at diversifying the oil based economy and the blood chilling murder of journalist Jamal Khashoggi in the Saudi consulate at Istanbul, the limelight has finally shifted from Donald Trump to MBS. At the same time, the world has also turned its one open eye to young women who have fled from Saudi Arabia. The year began with Rahaf Mohammad Al qunun barricading herself in a Thai hotel, in an attempt to prevent her deportation back to Saudi Arabia. She did not want to face the same fate of Dina Lasloom who had been intercepted by Saudi authorities at the Thai airport and deported back to Saudi Arabia in 2017, never to be heard from again. Al qunun, the daughter of a Saudi Arabian governor (who disowned her as ‘mentally unstable’), described the alarming abuse and threats she faced at home. She was locked up in her room for six months because she cut her hair the ‘wrong way’ and beaten up by her elder brother for removing her niqab. This incident throws light on Saudi Arabia’s rampant guardianship or wali system. Under Saudi law, each woman has a male guardian, who may be the woman’s husband, father, brother or son. Without their permission, women are not allowed to marry, travel, obtain a divorce or open a bank account and do many activities that are considered trivial for women around the world. Though the wali system is not explicitly mentioned in Saudi law, it is practiced according to the understanding of officials and institutions such as the police, hospitals and courts. This means that the boundaries and scope of the wali system is like an amoeba and is subject to individual interpretation rather than scholastic jurisprudence. The shallow nature of the system can be summarized when activist Wajeha Al- Huwaider said that if she wanted to remarry, she would have to get the permission of her son. Defenders of the wali system like Noura Abdulrahman, who was employed in the Saudi Ministry of Education called the basis of such a system as “love”. She said “They (the guardians) ask nothing in return- they only want to be with me. The image in the West is that we are dominated by men, but they always forget the aspect of love”. Even assuming that the first sentence is true, the second sentence lacks both common sense and logic. What this system represents is not love but pure cruel slavery. What is loving in beating up a woman just because she decided to step out of the house alone? What is loving in deciding a woman’s entire life to suit the male guardian’s needs with no regard to the woman? And most importantly what is loving in a patriarchy? It is important to remember that this system is more about patriarchy than about religion. In 2019, Saudi Arabia launched an app called Absher which apart from providing a plethora of services like renewing passports, applying for jobs and Hajj permits, can also be used to track the whereabouts of a woman under a man’s guardianship. The app would send a message to the guardian if it detected the use of passport at the border by the woman under his guardianship. Al qunun’s story could be considered a repetition of Laura’s (pseudonym) who was also granted asylum in Canada. Across the globe, stranded in Hong Kong, are two sisters Reem and Rawan (pseudonyms) who spent six months in the city instead of a two hour stopover on their way to Australia. They also retell stories of abuse in the hands of their father and brothers. Currently they are hanging on a loose thread of hope that they would not be deported. They describe themselves as “fish trapped in a little oasis that is rapidly drying out”. Reem hopes to become an author to tell the sisters’ experiences to the world. Saudi Arabia is known for many gender unjust laws such as the muttawa or religious police and gender segregation in buses and stadiums much like the Apartheid system. MBS has been praised for allowing women to drive and go to stadiums. The thing about freedom is that is cannot be served in small doses. Neither can it be superficial to please an international community. Giving women the right to vote in 2015 and the right to drive in 2018 is not called freedom, it is called a late dawning to allow their mere existence as humans in the world. When the entire world was ready to take severe action against the kingdom over the murder of Jamal Khashoggi why not about the centuries old male guardianship system? It is ironic that Sophia the humanoid robot who was granted citizenship in Saudi Arabia was not forced to wear an abaya like the millions of women in the kingdom. Al qunun’s dramatic escape is a milestone in the path to freedom for Saudi Arabian women. In the words of Al qunun “I am sure that there will be a lot more women running away. I hope my story encourages other women to be brave and free”.